Personally Training Myself To Find My Gumption

If you’re still out there reading this, you know that I’m not going to college.

So, in lieu of that, I decided to go to National Personal Training School for four months. I’m working out two to three hours a day, and learning all about the body and it’s unique ways for about three and a half.

And you know what?

love it.

I love the fact that I’m in Week Two and my muscles have ached in ways I forgot they could.

I love the fact that my clean eating isn’t stared at, but acknowledged as acceptable, if not the right thing to do.

It’s great. But more than that, it’s all about change.

As I condition my body to be more functional (and, let’s face it, a little more aesthetically pleasing), I can feel my self-confidence growing.

I admit, I feel a little awkward some days. I’m not super-skinny, nor am I made of pure muscle. I’m just me. 

Sometimes, I feel really awkward in my Warped Tour ’10 shirt and leggings, with my hair pulled back, and nowhere near the amount of eyeliner and lipstick I feel like myself in. Add this in with a room full of mirrors, and yup, there’s me: Little Miss Self-Conscious.

However, once I start to move my body, all of that insecurity melts away (much like my fat–mwahahaha!). As I get to know my classmates, lift heavier weights, and push myself that little bit farther, I feel more comfortable, stronger, and a helluva lot more confident!

The soreness has finally faded away, so I think my muscles are ready for just about whatever I want to throw at them next.

I’m also getting more comfortable with instructing people through a workout, which, I have to say, is a great feeling. If you’re ever looking for the ultimate, “Ahhh! I did something right! I’m so cool, look at me go!” feeling, that’s it right there.

Tomorrow is Fun Friday, which means I don’t have to follow a set workout plan, I just get to do what I want around the gym. I will do the usual–get there an hour early, begin a workout, et cetera.

After being bullied for a long time, and called awful names just because I wasn’t skinny enough to see my bones (this is by no means a body-shaming comment; every body type is beautiful–respect them all), I’m finally starting to appreciate my body a little bit more every day. I’m finally looking beyond what it looks like, and finally paying attention to all the awesome things it can do: bench press/squat a forty-five pound bar, lift some heavy weights, gain that bit more endurance, et cetera.

Gumption is all about confidence. You can’t have confidence without self-respect, and a little self-appreciation. Appreciate what your body and mind are capable of.

Appreciate the amazing thoughts and ideas that come out of you.

Appreciate the power that you have in every muscle in your body to push further, run faster, and jump higher, even when you think you can’t keep going.

That’s GUMPTION, people.

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